in search of Walla Walla

There really is a Walla Walla, you know. It's in Washington. It's very pretty, at least on GoogleEarth, in the Columbia River valley. It's also home to Whitman College, one of around sixty places I'm in the process of applying for a job. But for me and the neighbs, "Walla Walla" has come to stand in for "wherever I get a real job, most likely far, far away from here". And Walla Walla seems to loom large in most of our conversations lately.

I've been schlepping out these resumés, oscillating between the terror of leaving this town after eleven years and the tedium of assembling and mailing out parts of my portfolio. And the kicker is that where I go isn't really up to me, but instead depends on where I'm needed, so every time I drop a new round of envelopes in the mailbox I have to wrap my mind around what my life would be like a year from now if I ended up in L.A. or Miami or Burlington or Eugene or Newport News.

So far I haven't had to apply anywhere I simply couldn't imagine making a life for myself, although it's hard to tell. I look at the Michigan schools on the list, and they seem perfectly innocuous in black and white. But how do I know that I haven't accidentally applied at the Pennsylvania, or Louisiana, or Utah equivalent of Alma College? Not to say anything against Alma, it's just I'm willing to bet I'd have a significant commute if I craved sushi at 12:30 a.m. (or p.m, for that matter).

In lieu of a fool-proof method of ensuring I don't end up someplace sucky, I've come up with a no-K policy. I have yet to apply to any university in a state whose name contains the letter K.

Think about it.

I'd very much like to end up somewhere a reasonable person might reflect, "I wonder if I will need my snowbrush this year". I'd prefer a blue state, and I'd be willing to use the word "y'all" but not to the exclusion of "you guys". I'd rather be a Tarheel than a Buckeye, but I'd much sooner be a Buckeye than a Hoosier. Then again, having spent a significant amount of time among adjunct and part-time university instructors lately, trying to get them to unionize, I guess I'd settle for anywhere that had health insurance and a decent salary.

Unless of course it's in Texas.